In Perpetuity

fire in fire pit

In perpetuity: endless or indefinitely long duration or existence; eternity. i.e., forever.

One of my patrons reached out to me on Patreon the other day with a link.

It states that: “YouTube may terminate your access, or your Google account’s access to all or part of the Service if YouTube believes, in its sole discretion, that provision of the Service to you is no longer commercially viable.”

My patron asked me:

“How are you preparing to [deal with] google [and] of you tube terms and conditions 10 december?”
The short answer I have right now is this.
I’m slowly loading videos from YouTube to there as a sort of alternative or backup. The question remains, what do I do about my live streams? And what do I do in the “long run?”
There are no easy answers to this question. Shortest answer to that is that I do nothing. I’m a writer (according to Vince) and I’m an entertainer. I run my mouth is what I do. I get people to laugh, sometimes. And sometimes I guess I drop little nuggets and jewels out of my mouth. Don’t ask me how or where they came from, they just do. I guess it’s my observations and my life experiences driving the bus when it happens. My inner idiot must go somewhere else when it happens.
Like I’ve seen said somewhere before, “Whatever drunk me did, take it up with drunk me. Sober me wasn’t a part of the shenanigans.” Or something like that. Nugget dropping Rob is his own dude. Shit talking Rob is usually at the helm.
Anyways, where was I? Oh yes. Me backing my shit up to another service in the event that YouTube and/or Google decides to pull the plug on me.
I could back it up to a whole bunch of places I’m sure. I could even host it on my own computer and set up a streaming server or something like that I imagine. I’ve heard block-chain whatever it is, could be another alternative.
Guys, I’m not a coder. I don’t have the time, inclination, nor the know-how. I write and I talk shit. I’ve got enough shit to do let alone “learn to code.” There’s only so many hours in the day to do the shit I want to do, and coding ain’t one of them.
So there’s all of these alternatives…The underlying problem, the elephant in the room, remains.
It’s still someone else’s platform.
YouTube, Bitchute, Anchor, Patreon, Soundcloud, even my e-mail list, whatever. It’s still someone else’s platform. They all can pull the trigger for any reason at any time. Maybe it’s advertisers putting pressure, maybe it’s funding. Maybe it’s the guys running it got tired of doing it. It doesn’t matter.
Short of me coding my own shit, or paying someone to do it, and then running it out of my own home, from my own computer, it’s someone else’s platform. Besides that, computers die. All the time. Hard drives die. All the time. External drives die. All the time. Same with flash drives, thumb drives, tape drives, and stick drives. Ask me how I know.
While I would love to have my stuff “out there” forever, odds are it won’t be. I’m just another voice screaming into the void. There are far bigger and better voices that are saying the same things I’m saying, and they are saying it better than I ever could. I’m okay with that. I’m not here for the preservation and archiving of my stuff. That’s on someone else if they so choose to do it. I’m here for the laughs, the beer, and the shit talking.
Any of you guys that guy? A preservationist? An archivist? A “keeper of the records?” Reach out to me, let’s talk, seriously. Until something like that happens, I’m not going to worry about it too much.
When I thought about the “preservation” of my stuff, it got me to thinking about something else as well. Specifically, how long do I plan on doing this stuff? I haven’t really given it any proper thought before. Right now, the short answer is, “I’ll do it for as long as I want or can. Or I’ll do it until I no longer want to do it. Or I’ll do it until I’ve said all I need to say.” So yeah, I’m not going anywhere any time soon.
Do I honestly want to be doing this in say, 20 years? Like Rollo? God bless the Man for what he is doing. I think he’s truly doing God’s work and he’s proven time and time again that it’s about the message, not the messenger. But is that me? No. It’s not. In 20 years, if I happen to live that long, I’ll be almost 68 years old. I’ll be my Dad’s age. I hope to God that I’m doing something else by then. Maybe sitting on a beach sipping Tequila, or having Vince fly me around in a private airplane or something. I honestly hope I’m still not yelling at a computer screen. Why?
Because then I will have failed.
If you guys out there, aren’t getting what you need from me, or my interpretation of the message, then somehow I have failed you. More importantly, YOU have failed you. I can’t sit here and spoon feed this stuff to you for the rest of your lives. At some point, you’re going to have to jump off into the deep end and swim. You’re going to have to join the club. You’re going to have to commit to it too. You will be initiated. Whether you want to be or not. Whether you are ready or not. Your own futures depend on it.
Somebody is going to have to pick up the torch and carry it, just like I’ve been doing. Somebody is going to have to do the work once I’m done and all the other guys who are doing it, now, are done.
Somebody out there is going to have to preserve it. I just know that that particular part isn’t mine, and maybe my take isn’t worth preserving. I’m okay with that. Like I said, I’m just here for the laughs and the occasional take on things. I’m just here to run my mouth.
Whether my take on things stands the test of time or not isn’t my concern. I’m just concerned with saying it. It’s on you guys out there, reading this, watching it, listening to it, to decide if you want to do anything with it and use it or not. And it’ll most likely be up to you if you decide it’s worth preserving for the future or not.
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I Do It For The Memories


Here’s a little fun fact you may, or may not know about me:

I’m a photographer. Not professionally mind you, but I’ve spent a lot of time behind the lense. My favorite type of photography has been landscapes, but I also love taking pictures of people. “Portraits.” I don’t do it for money because then it’s work. And I definitely won’t ever do wedding photography. I’ve seen what a nightmare that can be for the photographers who do it. Nope, not for me.

Why haven’t you seen any of my photos here or on any of my other platforms? Because I realized something critical a while ago. While I love shooting photos and being behind the lens, I also realized that I wasn’t “in the moment” during those shoots. I was too busy composing shots, making sure the lighting was what I wanted, getting whatever subject I was shooting exactly where I wanted them, etc., I wasn’t “a part of it.” I was missing out. I was missing out on that particular moment and on life in general. I was observing but I wasn’t participating.

I figured out my mission a while ago, but I didn’t have the words to describe it or label it. I have that now. My mission is to fully live, enjoy my life, have a variety of experiences with the people I engage with, and suck the marrow out of life.

Yes I know that’s vague in many ways. It doesn’t have that “I will make a million dollars by October 3rd of 2020” feel that many people will encourage you to have. You know, get fucking specific and all. The thing is, life is funny. You make all sorts of plans, set all sorts of goals, and life does what its going to do whether you like it or not. “Men plan. God laughs.”

What made me bring up my photography? A friend invited me to go camping and kayaking with them this last weekend. I thought about breaking out the camera gear and taking it with me. I got everything out, charged up all the batteries, brushed up on a few things that I had forgotten about my camera, did some test shots to make sure everything was going to work as planned, packed all that gear into their respective bags, set it all out to load in the truck, and then left it all home.

I really thought about bringing all that stuff, I really did. And part of me really wanted to bring it along, but I didn’t. I decided at the very last minute to leave it all home. I used the camera built into my phone instead. Getting behind the lens puts me out of the moment, I’m not “there,” not really. I’m not in my body, but in my head. I’m not living my mission. I’m not truly living if I’m not there.

I’ll figure out a way to integrate my photography and my mission, and when I do, I’m sure I’ll bore you all to tears with photos of me doing my thing with the people that I meet and the places that I see and go to. Until then though, I’ll just have to be satisfied with sucking the marrow out of life, living it fully. And you guys will have to read or hear about it after-the-fact, here, or on one of my other platforms. Better yet, we will be able to say to one another, “You remember when we did that shit?!” “Yeah man, that was fucking awesome!” That’s alright with me. I can do that. I can live with the memories even if I don’t have the photos to go along with it.

At least I can say that I lived and was fully present in that moment. And that’s enough for me.

I’m doing this thing called “life,” for the memories, the friendships, the experiences, and the connections. That’s my mission. That’s my goal. Care to join me?

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Do You Even “Like” Women?

afterglow art backlit bokeh

“A Man Who Loves Women is Loved By Women.” – Zan Perrion.
Yeah yeah, Zan has received flak for being “purple pilled.” He’s definitely got a sort of “new age sensitive guy” thing going on and he can get all metaphysical, flowery, and mystical.
He’s not wrong though.
I’ve got a serious question for you guys though. It might be one of the most serious questions of your life.
You don’t need to answer me, but you do need to answer to yourself, and be honest with yourself. There’s no wrong answer here.
Here’s the question:
Do you like women?
I’m pretty sure you guys want women for a variety of reasons. But do you like them? Or do you simply want what they can give you? Do you want something from them? No wrong answers.
I’m bracing for the inevitable, “You’re virtue signalling to the wahmen!” with my next remark, but fuck it, here it goes:
I like women. I like being around them. I like them for being them. I honestly don’t have an agenda with them.  It’s not always about attraction and sex, I just genuinely like them. Even when they say and do stupid shit.
It wasn’t always that way.
Of course I wanted sex. Who doesn’t? But I can say up until a couple of years ago, I didn’t actually like them. I didn’t trust them. I figured they had agendas (and they do, but everyone does.) Hypergamy, AWALT, branch swinging, all of that stuff. Now I know that stuff exists and I know that women can and sometimes do, some fucked up shit. But I like them anyway. It’s a conscious choice for me.
I have a friend who recently started unplugging from the matrix. He’s taking care of his weight and his diet. He’s dressing better. He’s even starting to “get back out there” as far as being around women goes.
He’s still dealing with a lot of shit though. His latest thing is his “Alpha Agent of Righteous Karma” thing. He’s snubbing women closer to his own (and my own) age. Basically one of those, “Ha! Fuck you ladies! You didn’t want me back when we were in our 20’s! Well you can’t have me now in our late 40’s! Suck it!”
I’m exaggerating on the language part, but that’s pretty much the mentality. I know what that’s like because I’ve been there too, in the past. But I got through it and over it. I hope he does too. Until then, he gets to burn. I’m not going to try to tell him, “Dude. What you’re doing? Yeah, that’s not it.”
Guys, if you want to get “good” with women, I want you to understand a few things:
There are no tricks, hacks, tips, magic pills, short cuts, systems, or lines that will work.
Not if you want to be “good” with women over the long haul. Yeah you might pick up a few drunk ones and maybe a couple of really adventurous ones once in awhile using lines, hacks, systems and tricks. But honestly, almost all women can smell that bullshit from miles away. I know because I’ve tried it and failed spectacularly.
First things first. You have to get your mental shit together. You have to genuinely like women. You can’t hold grudges and do this “Alpha Agent of Righteous Karma” bullshit with them. So whatever bullshit you have against the women from your past, you need to get through that. You need to deal with that. You need to get over it.
You have to like women in order to love women. And if and when you do, they will love you in return and that’s when things get really fun and interesting. That’s when the world opens up to you.
I’m not bullshitting you and trying to paint some bullshit fluffy picture. It’s the only way I can describe it though.
When I gave up my anger towards women and began to actually genuinely like them, I learned to love them and they loved me back, hard.
So when you see or hear guys talk about, “I only bang 9’s and 10’s brah lol” Dude, that’s not it.
It’s okay if you don’t like them right now. Maybe you got really fucked over. Maybe you got really fucked over more than once. I get it. I’m not judging you. You just need to be honest with yourself and where you are at right now, mentally, with women.
Do you like them? Or do you just want something from them? Sex? Validation? Cure for loneliness? A hate fuck? It’s all good by me.
Do you like talking to them because you enjoy conversing with them? Or are you trying to “seduce” them? There’s a difference here.
I’m sure that I’m going to catch heat for what I’ve said here. “You’re pedestalizing the wahmen!” “You’re making it all about the wahmen!” “You’re giving the wahmen a pass!” “Your frame! You’re losing it!” No. I’m not.
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