Let ‘Em Burn

bonfire during sunset
Enjoy The Decline.

I’m sitting here thinking about all the people I’ve met so far, all of the adventures that I have had. One of the recurring things that keep coming up, time and time again, is “how to save someone.”

The truth is, you can’t save them. Only they can save themselves. You have to let them burn. While I would like to save others, it’s not my job, nor is it appreciated for the most part. You can learn from other’s mistakes, but at the end of the day, it’s first hand experience that teaches best and teaches the most.

You see a guy about to do something really dumb when it comes to women? Let ’em burn. He’ll get the message eventually. Or maybe not. Maybe he’s going to make that same mistake over and over until the end of his days. Not your problem. Not my problem. Don’t get me wrong, once he falls on his ass and burns, if he’s willing to take my hand, I’ll help him up and dust him off, help him get going again. But he’s got to burn first. He’s got to feel that pain, that loss, that total sense of “I fucked up royally,” in order to get where he needs to go.

You see a woman about to do something that could potentially fuck her entire life up? Let her burn. I’m pretty sure it goes against our nature as Men to stand by and watch a woman flush her life, her looks, her health, and her beauty down the toilet, but you got to let her burn. It may be the only way to truly help her. She needs to understand that there’s consequences for her actions and her behaviors. “Saving her from herself” will only teach her that it’s okay to be irresponsible, and she’ll just keep doing the stupid shit that she’s doing and she’ll keep expecting that someone will bail her out. I’m pretty sure this is part of why we are where we are now in today’s world.

And speaking about our modern world, where we are now, you can’t save society from itself. I’m not trying to be cynical and “doom and gloom,” but do you really think you can save an entire society by yourself? Especially one that seems hell-bent on destroying itself? I’m not talking about giving up hope, downing a bunch of drugs and booze and ultimately slitting your wrists or putting a gun to your head, because fuck it, why the hell not? I’m talking about carving out a life for yourself and yours that works for you. In the past, under the worst conditions, under the most oppressive regimes, in the darkest of times, people carved out lives for themselves. They made it work with what they had. They had their moments, they had their joys. They thrived in their own ways.

That’s what Enjoy The Decline means. Carve out a life worth living for you and yours. Enjoy the moments, both big and little as they come. Laugh. Celebrate your achievements, all of them, big and small. Don’t worry about saving the world. The world was here before all of us and will be here long after we are all gone.

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I tweeted the picture above a little while ago. There’s two ways you can look at life. You can be sad and depressed that nobody gives a shit, or you can be happy and excited that nobody gives a shit. Either way, nobody gives a shit. I know which one I’m choosing.

I have a cat sitting on my lap while I’m typing this. He’s content, he’s full, and he’s purring. He doesn’t give a shit about society and the world at large. His whole world is 1208 square feet of a condominium. It’s all he knows. It’s all he cares about. That and when he’s getting his next meal. I can’t read his mind, and I don’t speak cat, but I’m pretty sure he doesn’t give a shit what I’m typing about. I’m also pretty sure that he doesn’t give a shit about you since he’s never met you. He’s friendly enough that if you were ever to meet him, I’m pretty sure he would like you though, but until then, you don’t exist to him, and he doesn’t give a shit about that either way.

We as Men live in a time, where let’s face it, the gender war is over. We have already lost. And that’s okay. We lost that war a long time ago. For most of us, the war was already over before we were even born. We can choose to mope around, saying shit like, “we lost…” Or we can choose to say, “Fuck it! We lost! What do we want to do now?” We aren’t needed for the most part, we aren’t necessary for the most part, and for many people, both men and women alike, hell, we aren’t even wanted for the most part. And that’s okay too. We as men live in a time where we can travel the world without having to wear a military uniform in order to do it, we can come and go for the most part as we please. If you have even a modicum of muscle to your body and aren’t grossly out of shape, you can even go out and get laid with ease. Women are easy like that these days. The stigma of being a slut is gone, the stigma of being a single mother is gone, and women want to take on the “curse of man” and join him, and even replace him in the workplace, why not let them?

Guys, we are adaptable by nature. We adapt and improvise. We can adapt and overcome. It’s what we do. We are good at it if you think about it. We can adapt and improvise to this as well. Honestly we have been doing it already, maybe just not in ways that work the best for us. Time to change your mindsets about that. If we are unnecessary, what then, works for you? Do that. If you aren’t needed and you won’t be missed by many, why not do the things you always wanted to do? Go motorcycling. Go see the world. Go and flirt with the girls. If they aren’t interested, that’s okay, because in the end, nobody gives a shit, so you move on and keep going. Learn a new language because you can. We live a life of leisure when you really think about it, at least compared to days of the past.

Some will try and shame you. They’ll say, “you disgrace your ancestors.” I say, “my ancestors are dead. They aren’t watching what I’m doing. And if they are, they don’t give a shit, because nobody gave a shit back then either.” I don’t know about your ancestors, but my most recent ones, the one’s that were alive when I was young, all they cared about when it concerned me, was that I was healthy and happy. I’m both. So I’m doing just fine by their standards. And the one’s that came way before me? I didn’t exist during their time. They didn’t know me and they didn’t know of me. I guarantee that they didn’t give a shit. So why should I give a shit?

If you want to wring your hands and clutch your pearls about society, that’s okay by me. You do you. I’ll let you burn. All the shaming and self flagellation isn’t going to change the world, just in case you were wondering. But hey, once you are done doing that, I’ll help you up, dust you off, and maybe we can drink a beer and enjoy the decline.

And if you are a woman, maybe when you stop shaving the side of your head, stop dying your hair multiple colors, you decide to shave your pits and your legs, and you lose a bit of weight, I’ll tease you for being the silly girl that you’ve always been, and we’ll drink a beer and enjoy the decline. Or you can keep railing against “the patriarchy,” you can focus on your corporate career (which no one gives a shit about except you, even your corporate masters don’t give a shit about you, you’re just another cog in the machine, trust me, I know) and you can keep telling yourself that your education and your things that you buy are more important than the people in your life. It’s okay, I’ll let you burn. Maybe you’ll figure it out in time, maybe not. Either way, nobody gives a shit. Not really. And that’s okay.

Enjoy the Decline.

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8 thoughts on “Let ‘Em Burn

  1. […] So this Independence Day, while you are drinking your drinks, lighting off your fireworks, and waving your flags around, I hope you take a moment and reflect on what real freedom is. Remember that there are those around you that have an agenda, and it’s not necessarily to your benefit. And I say, let them burn. […]

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  2. […] I use humor in all sorts of ways to take the edge off. I try and find humor in the ludicrous world that we live in. The alternative is to take it too seriously, and I don’t want to go there. I’ll either laugh my ass off or tear at my face and scream and cry my eyes out, except the tears won’t come. So for the most part Dad, I’ve decided to just enjoy the decline. […]

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  3. […] telling you that it’s okay to play the villain. Maybe they are telling you that sometimes, people have to burn. Maybe they are telling you that sometimes, you have to burn the village in order to save […]

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